We've never been so happy to tell the truth in our lives. Now, that being said, we want to give the little buggers a place to go lick their wounds. Here are several positive options.
A.Cheerleaders anonymous. Helps with frozen smile afflictions.
B. Liars in Recovery. For those who just can't help themselves. Its is genetic, after all.
C. 12 Steps for the surgically addicted. You learn the steps slowly, so don't worry, there is time to sneak in a quickie lipo session.
D. Cheaters for Change. A Cold turkey program, so not for the faint at heart.
E. Toxic personality detox. Includes an colon cleanse for extra nastiness syndrome.
F. Hypnosis for airheads, followed by a session with crystals for realigning brain cells and getting those receptors firing normallly again. Yes, kids, we promise to beam up your Mu receptors, but forget about the Kappas. Yours are shot, now c'mon you already knew that. Too much bup.
G. Oral Cleanse for potty mouths, and....well. Not for the agnostic.
H. Advocates for Truth- a mentoring program for the terminally dishonest.
You'll have a chance to listen to key note speakers on truth, then monthly you will be responsible for having dinners with others afflicted with dishonesty. Round tables may be held only at White Castle Burgers. B.Y.O. B. Thats beverage, ass hole, we aren't promoting alcohol here.
The speakers will not be reimbursed. The group must donate out of their allowance from the Juvenile hall snack pool coffers to get one. Still, its amazing how people are willing to share their stories.
I. Last but not least, Ass Kissers and Brown nosers group support. Meets daily at noon, to keep you lips on lunch and not on your managers cell phone. B.Y.O.L. Bring your own lunch. No, you can't expense it off to RB. While you may claim its a work related condition, gimme a break.
J. Oh, there is another group forming, this just in from "We Might be able to help you central" Managers with partners. A sponsorship program for people who found themselves in a management position, without having to do anything. This will help you cope with the shock. We can do nothing about your team who dispises you, but still you can come listen to real managers explain why, what you did to get yourself here, and that it should not be repeated. Your sponsors will help you to accept the fact that you were never management material, but also will help you see how lucky you were to have someone willing to stick their neck out and lie to get you where you are. For those that lied about their co-workers, made up cute little vignettes of wrongdoings by people their managers used to like, just to fuck, excuse me, push pass them, so you would get where you needed to go. This is for you, too.
A.Cheerleaders anonymous. Helps with frozen smile afflictions.
B. Liars in Recovery. For those who just can't help themselves. Its is genetic, after all.
C. 12 Steps for the surgically addicted. You learn the steps slowly, so don't worry, there is time to sneak in a quickie lipo session.
D. Cheaters for Change. A Cold turkey program, so not for the faint at heart.
E. Toxic personality detox. Includes an colon cleanse for extra nastiness syndrome.
F. Hypnosis for airheads, followed by a session with crystals for realigning brain cells and getting those receptors firing normallly again. Yes, kids, we promise to beam up your Mu receptors, but forget about the Kappas. Yours are shot, now c'mon you already knew that. Too much bup.
G. Oral Cleanse for potty mouths, and....well. Not for the agnostic.
H. Advocates for Truth- a mentoring program for the terminally dishonest.
You'll have a chance to listen to key note speakers on truth, then monthly you will be responsible for having dinners with others afflicted with dishonesty. Round tables may be held only at White Castle Burgers. B.Y.O. B. Thats beverage, ass hole, we aren't promoting alcohol here.
The speakers will not be reimbursed. The group must donate out of their allowance from the Juvenile hall snack pool coffers to get one. Still, its amazing how people are willing to share their stories.
I. Last but not least, Ass Kissers and Brown nosers group support. Meets daily at noon, to keep you lips on lunch and not on your managers cell phone. B.Y.O.L. Bring your own lunch. No, you can't expense it off to RB. While you may claim its a work related condition, gimme a break.
J. Oh, there is another group forming, this just in from "We Might be able to help you central" Managers with partners. A sponsorship program for people who found themselves in a management position, without having to do anything. This will help you cope with the shock. We can do nothing about your team who dispises you, but still you can come listen to real managers explain why, what you did to get yourself here, and that it should not be repeated. Your sponsors will help you to accept the fact that you were never management material, but also will help you see how lucky you were to have someone willing to stick their neck out and lie to get you where you are. For those that lied about their co-workers, made up cute little vignettes of wrongdoings by people their managers used to like, just to fuck, excuse me, push pass them, so you would get where you needed to go. This is for you, too.