T. Sutton

[Anonymous]

What can anyone tell me about him?

 

[Anonymous]

What can anyone tell me about him?

He is the brother of Don Sutton, former pitcher.

 

[Anonymous]

In college his nickname was "the smokehouse"...when asked why "smokehouse", the answer was: because that's where the meat hangs

 

[Anonymous]

I heard he has nicknames for his right and left biceps, widow maker and bone crusher respectively

 

[Anonymous]

He once handed me a business card and it simply said: "I'll call you"

 

[Anonymous]

He has won the lifetime achievement award, twice.

 

[Anonymous]

He bowls overhand

 

[Anonymous]

When he's late for work, he makes up for it by leaving early

 

[Anonymous]

He doesn't always drink milk...but when he does it's from boobies

 

[Anonymous]

He knows Victoria's secret.

 

[Anonymous]

This may be the funniest thing I've ever read on here.

 

[Anonymous]

It's funny because it's true

 

[Anonymous]

Did I ever tell you about the time Sutton showed up at my daughter's wedding? You know my daughter, she's a beautiful girl. Well, Sutton shows up and you know he's a big fella. Well, he's standing right between me and my daughter at the ceremony. He's got no right to be there, but he's drunk and he's Sutton. Well, long story short, the priest accidentally marries me and Sutton. We spend the weekend in the Poconos — he loved me like I've never been loved before.

 

[Anonymous]

I remember one time Sutton took his family to Sea World. They were watching Shamu the whale when Sutton got splashed. So he yells, 'I'm T. Sutton and no one gets me wet!' So he climbs into the tank, grabs Shamu, and throws the whale into the audience, splashes him and yells, 'How do you like it?' And then damn if Sutton didn't step in there and finish the show.

 

[Anonymous]

He wears a live rattlesnake as a condom

 

[Anonymous]

I went camping with Sutton ... I'm in the back of a pickup with T. Sutton and a live deer. Well, Sutton, he grabs the deer by the antlers, looks at it and says, 'I'm T. Sutton! Say it!' Then he squeezes the deer in such a way that a sound comes out of its mouth -- "T.Sutton!" It wasn't exactly it, but it was pretty good for a deer

 

[Anonymous]

Did I ever tell you about the time Sutton took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally, Sutton takes me into a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' Well, we sat there for a year and a half. Sure enough, someone constructed a bar around us. Well, the day they opened it, we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burnt the place to the ground. Sutton yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found them!'"

 

[Anonymous]

Sutton once forced me to wear a woman's bikini! Well anyway, Sutton tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.

 

[Anonymous]

He's a ten-foot tall beast man, who showers in vodka, and feeds his baby shrimp scampi.

 

[Anonymous]

Sutton's family crest is a picture of a barracuda, eating Neil Armstrong