The organizers of the Occupy Wall Street protest finally released their list of 13 demands, about two weeks into the protest. Better never than late.
First among them is a demand for a law that raises the minimum wage to $20 per hour. Leading with such a foolish idea makes it pretty hard to read the other 12 without thinking it is the first draft of a David Letterman Top Ten List compiled by someone who learned math in a government school.
Paying somebody $20 is easy, but it takes more than a law for someone’s work to be worth more than $20. They have to possess employable skills that are in demand, exhibit a positive attitude, be accountable, and work well with others – and then actually do something that is worth at least $21 to someone else. Coming in two weeks late with a badly composed single page list is not the kind of performance that is worth $20/hour to anybody - I can see why they think a law is necessary.
But they are wrong; minimum wage laws are unnecessary. Median income in the private sector is just under $50,000 per year, or $25 per hour, which is roughly three times the minimum wage mandated by Congress.
What law makes a company pay an employee $25? Better yet, what law forced that employee to become worth more than $25? It is the Law of Supply and Demand; and it is apparently 3 times better, as laws go, than the one Congress passed to set a wage floor. It is useful to remind ourselves why more than half of the people working in this country are already paid $5 more per hour than what these Wall Street occupiers consider “justice”. The answer, of course, is that their work adds more than $25 to the value of the company which employs them.
The story is the same for the $12 wage and the $12 million salary. Brett Favre used to be worth millions, and now he isn’t; Aaron Rodgers wasn’t worth millions watching Brett play; now he is worth every penny of the millions he makes playing, but in a few years he won’t be worth millions again. It’s what you do that pays, not what you know.
There is no government legislation that forces companies to pay more than the minimum wage, just as there is no law that forces companies to provide benefits, or schedule 40 hour weeks, or name holidays, or grant paid vacations. And yet most firms do. Why? Because the law of supply and demand tells them to; and they must obey the laws of economics or perish. Unlike the perverted corporatism practiced in New York and Washington D.C., the free market has no mechanism to bail out fools, frauds, and failures.
In reality, there is no law that forces companies to actually pay that minimum wage either; most just eliminate the job that is only worth below-minimum. Setting the minimum wage to $20 would eliminate all the jobs worth $19.99 and under. This will add many tens of millions of Americans to the ranks of the unemployed and push us over 50% unemployment.
I don’t think the occupiers understood how this economics stuff works, but as luck would have it they don’t have to, since they included a separate demand that everyone who doesn’t work receive a living wage. “Eaters”, Henry Kissinger called them; who knew it would become a professional vocation one day.
Another occupation demand is a free college education for everyone. I’m all for that, but not for the reasons you might think. A no-cost education is only possible if there is no cost to it – no salaries, wages, pensions, maintenance, heat, light, books, etc. I think it is a terrific idea for University faculty and staff all across the nation to put their money where their mouth is and work for free in unheated classrooms to show their solidarity with the unionist occupation movement and stick it to us greedy, heartless, libertarian capitalists once and for all. Fists up, anyone?
The rest of the demand list is pretty lame and predictable economic suicide – cut off all the energy that is charging the iPhones, Droids, Bluetooth headsets, pads, and notebooks they use to spread the word about the occupation. And re-elect President Obama – appropriate, since their goal is to collapse the economic system.
But this one is bold: wipe out all debt all over the world. Private, public, corporate, sovereign – just forgive it all. Write off the tens of trillions owed to bond-holders and bank stockholders and start over; one giant global financial mulligan. I don’t suppose it has occurred to them that the entire U.S. Social Security system and every other pension plan in the country would be immediately wiped out and nobody would ever loan a penny to anyone ever again. Dark Ages, Part Dieux, and not one of those fools could shoot his dinner once Taco Bell goes dark.
Maybe if the occupiers had another two weeks to think about it, they would demand we annul all the marriages in the world, too – as long as we are tossing aside solemn commitments. Just throw the whole world’s car keys into one giant swingers’ bowl to give everybody a fair chance at landing Miss Venezuela or George Clooney, as you prefer.
Why not – this is all about fairness and privilege, right? It is certainly not fair that the privileged 1% are so unnecessarily beautiful while us 99%ers have to struggle just to be presentable. That is the whole point of this occupation thing – forcing the privileged few to give it up. I bet most of those guys, and a bunch of the girls, would take Eva Mendes over Trump’s money if you gave them the choice of which unjust deprivation they would cure first.
Don’t get me wrong; the protestors have every right to protest, and watching them comforts me that we are still a free country, Hank Jr. notwithstanding. What they don’t have a right to do is occupy; private property is private and public property belongs every bit as much to those Wall Street brokers as it does the dude in the dreads calling them names.
The occupiers should watch and learn from the Tea Party: get your permit, hold your rally, pick up your trash, and go back to work. Ask Nancy Pelosi if that was effective. And not to rub it in, but it is a safe bet that the Tea Party will send more of its own to Congress in 2012 again than will the Occupation Movement. Gingrich has a better shot of getting candidate pledges for his Contract Addendum with America than do the occupiers with their 13 points of light.
The good news, if you are an occupier, is that you got our attention and made your point; the bad news is that you got our attention and you have no point. You demand that we surrender our liberty to a mob that couldn’t even get your list of demands typed up on time. Sorry, I’m taking “or else”.
Want to do something useful to stand up to the Wall Street banksters? Why don’t you take a break from your occupation to read Ron Paul’s book “End The Fed” and then get back to us. Some of us have been rousing the rabble long before you occupiers were even born. Maybe we can do something useful together.