Some of my favorite posts from the past

Anonymous

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From the RTBLKP guy. This was one of my favorites.

Novartis to buy URANUS PHARMACEUTICALS RTBKPL
Novartis will soon announce the purchase of URANUS Pharmaceuticals, a leading manufacturer of hemorrhoid preparations, suppositories, bowel preps and other forms of medications aimed at treating anal and colon problems.
URANUS is located on the Hershey Highway, just outside of East Hanover, NJ.

URANUS is right up our alley stated a spokesman for Novartis. Several new field forces will soon be hired to sell the URANUS line of products.
Consistent with the Novartis sales model, there will be at least one representative from URANUS in each office each hour of every day.
Share of voice is our middle name said the spokesman.

URANUS will continue to be known under it's present name due to some outstanding core messages and tag lines used in the past. What doctor hasn't said "I want to see URANUS!"? Compare that to how many have said "I want to see Novartis." Makes good marketing sense said Engleburt
KoolAidDrinker, exceutive VP of sales. Nurses love going to the doctor and announcing "URANUS would like to speak with you doctor." Receptionists take note when a casually dressed representative states, "I AM FROM URANUS."

URANUS is big in France where suppository preparations are looked upon not only as therapy, but as recreation too. Sales in Key West, Florida lead the nation.

URANUS representatives will be required to drive the new choice in company cars by Novartis, the Prius. "We feel the Prius fits URANUS well," stated fleet car administrator Cheapo Konwinsky.

Novartis and URANUS will soon announce open call interviews in major metropolitan areas throughout the U.S. Purdue representatives will be encouraged to apply.
 

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