US ATTONEY GENERAL*Roger B., did you order the FAXED PA?*
Judge Randolph: You *don't* have to answer that question!
Roger B: I'll answer the question!
[to Kaffee]
Roger B: You want answers?
Kaffee: I think I'm entitled to.
Roger B: *You want answers?*
Kaffee: *I want the truth!*
Roger B: *You can't handle the truth!*
[pauses]
Roger B: Son, we live in a world that has PA’s and Step edits and all this other bullshi** invented by Managed care companies, and those barrieds have to be side stepped by men with forged PA’s, ulimited expense reports and bribes. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Cream puff? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the REP, and you curse the WARNER CHILLCOTT ARMY OF TYPE A Crazies. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That creampuffs s death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, prevents pregnancies, keeps zits at bay, and takes every penny an old lady can muster for a copay. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me in that office, you need me in that office. We use words like Pharma Guidelines, OIG code of conduct, and entertaining at strip clubs. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a blank PA form, and stand in a doctors office overlooking private information in charts. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
Kaffee: Did you order the Faxed PA?
Roger B: I did the job I...
Kaffee: *Did you order the Faxed PA?*
Roger B: *You're Goddamn right I did!*
US OIG ATTORNEY: [US OIG ATTORNEY has just asked why the Creampuff in question hadn't packed up his car despite being due to be shit canned in a few hours after the time of his death. ROGER B. smirks] Is this funny, sir?
Roger B: No, it isn't. It's tragic.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Do you have an answer to the question?
Roger B: Absolutely. My answer is I don't have the first damn clue. Maybe he was an early riser and liked to pack in the morning for his first sample drop before 8:30am. Hell I don’t know.. And maybe he didn't have any friends. I'm an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently about the travel habits of the CREAM PUFF. What I do know is that he was set to leave the happy with an office full of nurse at 1800 hours. Now, are these the questions I was really called here to answer? Phone calls and fax machines? Please tell me that you have something more, Counselor. These two CREAM PUFFS are on trial for their lives. Please tell me their lawyer hasn't pinned their hopes to a fax machine record.
[US OIG ATTORNEY hesitates, dumbfounded]
Roger B: Do you have any more questions for me, Counselor?
Judge Randolph: US OIG ATTORNEY?
[pause]
Judge Randolph: US OIG ATTORNEY, do you have anything further for this witness?
[Roger B defiantly gets up to leave the courtroom]
Roger B: Thanks, Danny. I love the OIG, FDA, and Pharma Guidelines.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Excuse me. I didn't dismiss you.
Roger B: I beg your pardon?
US OIG ATTORNEY: I'm not through with my examination. Sit down.
Roger B: Call me Chief!
US OIG ATTORNEY: What's that?
Roger B: I would appreciate it if he would address me as Chief or CEO or Big Rog with the Little Man’s syndrome or Sir. I believe I've earned it.
Judge Randolph: Defense counsel will address the witness as Big Rog or Carl’s little bitc**
Roger B: [to Judge] I don't know what the hell kind of Pharma Guidelines investigation you're running here.
Judge Randolph: And the witness will address this court as Judge or Your Honor. I'm quite certain I've earned it. Take your seat, Big Rog.
Roger B: [Judge dismisses the jury after Big Rog’s revelation on the stand about the Faxed PA] What is this? What's going on? I did my job, I'd do it again!
[stands up defiantly]
Roger B: I'm gonna get on a plane and go on back to my headquarters in Ireland.
Judge Randolph: You're not going anywhere, Roger. Deputies... guard the CEO!
[MPs take post]
Judge Randolph: ROGER B’ Attorney?
Roger B: What the hell is this?
ROBER B’s ATTORNEY: Roger B, you have the right to remain silent. Any statement you make...
Roger B: I'm being charged with a crime? Is that what this is? I'm being charged with a crime? This is funny. That's what this is. This is...
[turning to US OIG ATTORNEY and lunging at him]
Roger B: ... I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and piss into your dead skull! You f***D with the wrong Warner Chilcott Type A Crazy.
ROGER B’s Attorney: Roger B! Do you understand these rights as I have just read them to you?
Roger B: [contemptuously] You f**ing' people... you have no idea how to get a PA covered. All you did was weaken a CREAM PUFF, US OIG ATTORNEY. That's all you did. You put people's lives in danger. Sweet dreams, son.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Don't call me son. I'm a lawyer, and an officer in the US GOVERMENT, and you're under arrest you son of a bi**.
[glares at Jessep]
US OIG ATTORNEY: The witness is excused.
Judge Randolph: You *don't* have to answer that question!
Roger B: I'll answer the question!
[to Kaffee]
Roger B: You want answers?
Kaffee: I think I'm entitled to.
Roger B: *You want answers?*
Kaffee: *I want the truth!*
Roger B: *You can't handle the truth!*
[pauses]
Roger B: Son, we live in a world that has PA’s and Step edits and all this other bullshi** invented by Managed care companies, and those barrieds have to be side stepped by men with forged PA’s, ulimited expense reports and bribes. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Cream puff? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the REP, and you curse the WARNER CHILLCOTT ARMY OF TYPE A Crazies. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That creampuffs s death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, prevents pregnancies, keeps zits at bay, and takes every penny an old lady can muster for a copay. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me in that office, you need me in that office. We use words like Pharma Guidelines, OIG code of conduct, and entertaining at strip clubs. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a blank PA form, and stand in a doctors office overlooking private information in charts. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
Kaffee: Did you order the Faxed PA?
Roger B: I did the job I...
Kaffee: *Did you order the Faxed PA?*
Roger B: *You're Goddamn right I did!*
US OIG ATTORNEY: [US OIG ATTORNEY has just asked why the Creampuff in question hadn't packed up his car despite being due to be shit canned in a few hours after the time of his death. ROGER B. smirks] Is this funny, sir?
Roger B: No, it isn't. It's tragic.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Do you have an answer to the question?
Roger B: Absolutely. My answer is I don't have the first damn clue. Maybe he was an early riser and liked to pack in the morning for his first sample drop before 8:30am. Hell I don’t know.. And maybe he didn't have any friends. I'm an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently about the travel habits of the CREAM PUFF. What I do know is that he was set to leave the happy with an office full of nurse at 1800 hours. Now, are these the questions I was really called here to answer? Phone calls and fax machines? Please tell me that you have something more, Counselor. These two CREAM PUFFS are on trial for their lives. Please tell me their lawyer hasn't pinned their hopes to a fax machine record.
[US OIG ATTORNEY hesitates, dumbfounded]
Roger B: Do you have any more questions for me, Counselor?
Judge Randolph: US OIG ATTORNEY?
[pause]
Judge Randolph: US OIG ATTORNEY, do you have anything further for this witness?
[Roger B defiantly gets up to leave the courtroom]
Roger B: Thanks, Danny. I love the OIG, FDA, and Pharma Guidelines.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Excuse me. I didn't dismiss you.
Roger B: I beg your pardon?
US OIG ATTORNEY: I'm not through with my examination. Sit down.
Roger B: Call me Chief!
US OIG ATTORNEY: What's that?
Roger B: I would appreciate it if he would address me as Chief or CEO or Big Rog with the Little Man’s syndrome or Sir. I believe I've earned it.
Judge Randolph: Defense counsel will address the witness as Big Rog or Carl’s little bitc**
Roger B: [to Judge] I don't know what the hell kind of Pharma Guidelines investigation you're running here.
Judge Randolph: And the witness will address this court as Judge or Your Honor. I'm quite certain I've earned it. Take your seat, Big Rog.
Roger B: [Judge dismisses the jury after Big Rog’s revelation on the stand about the Faxed PA] What is this? What's going on? I did my job, I'd do it again!
[stands up defiantly]
Roger B: I'm gonna get on a plane and go on back to my headquarters in Ireland.
Judge Randolph: You're not going anywhere, Roger. Deputies... guard the CEO!
[MPs take post]
Judge Randolph: ROGER B’ Attorney?
Roger B: What the hell is this?
ROBER B’s ATTORNEY: Roger B, you have the right to remain silent. Any statement you make...
Roger B: I'm being charged with a crime? Is that what this is? I'm being charged with a crime? This is funny. That's what this is. This is...
[turning to US OIG ATTORNEY and lunging at him]
Roger B: ... I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and piss into your dead skull! You f***D with the wrong Warner Chilcott Type A Crazy.
ROGER B’s Attorney: Roger B! Do you understand these rights as I have just read them to you?
Roger B: [contemptuously] You f**ing' people... you have no idea how to get a PA covered. All you did was weaken a CREAM PUFF, US OIG ATTORNEY. That's all you did. You put people's lives in danger. Sweet dreams, son.
US OIG ATTORNEY: Don't call me son. I'm a lawyer, and an officer in the US GOVERMENT, and you're under arrest you son of a bi**.
[glares at Jessep]
US OIG ATTORNEY: The witness is excused.