New Opportunities

[Anonymous]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Great career opportunity selling snow removal equipment in Cary, NC. Hurry and apply!
You should consider applying for the anal thermometer position that just opened up in the new sales division for Strategic Future Capitalists. They are looking for individuals who have zero empathy for human beings or employees. I believe the posting stated "Must be able to insert thermometer without lubrication and prefer rep. who enjoys watching others in pain". Essentially they are looking for a sadist - the main requirement for Pharma, banking, or oil company executives. Must not be a citizen of the United States to be considered. Looking only for those who are pure Capitalists and believe money is everything in life. I can't remember the exact posting, but I believe it said, "want those who will sell soul to devil for dollars". Must also bring knee pads to interview since perfunctory duties will include, "servicing for scripts" (gender is not a disqualification). Also prefer those with big lips who have lost their olfactory senses. The future is bright and I believe you will have a great shot at this position if you meet the above criteria. Of course there is always the second option. Quit pharma sales and get a respectable job!

 

[Anonymous]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Great career opportunity selling snow removal equipment in Cary, NC. Hurry and apply!
You should consider applying for the anal thermometer position that just opened up in the new sales division for Strategic Future Capitalists. They are looking for individuals who have zero empathy for human beings or employees. I believe the posting stated "Must be able to insert thermometer without lubrication and prefer rep. who enjoys watching others in pain". Essentially they are looking for a sadist - the main requirement for Pharma, banking, or oil company executives. Must not be a citizen of the United States to be considered. Looking only for those who are pure Capitalists and believe money is everything in life. I can't remember the exact posting, but I believe it said, "want those who will sell soul to devil for dollars". Must also bring knee pads to interview since perfunctory duties will include, "servicing for scripts" (gender is not a disqualification). Also prefer those with big lips who have lost their olfactory senses. The future is bright and I believe you will have a great shot at this position if you meet the above criteria. Of course there is always the second option. Quit pharma sales and get a respectable job!

I agree so much! Bankers, Oil Executives, and Pharmaceutical Reps are out to get us! I like it the way Hugo Chavez does it best. No one should have more money than I do! Its not fair that someone has a better quality of life than I do. We should all work for the government because the government is a respectable job and I can be a loser and no one can say anything about it or else "The Great General" will punish them by giving them fewer rations. Lets do this! Lets all get respectable jobs!!!! I cant wait! Imagine how great things will be to not have to worry about olfactory senses anymore!