Is it true Dave Brennan is going to become an Italian Cruise Ship captain?

Anonymous

Guest
I hear his resume is perfect for the job.


<disclaimer - item is a parody and not meant to be taken seriously, a weak attempt at humor brought on by a depressed pharma worker who doesn't understand how golden parachutes work>
 
























Hey dave, are you feeling guilty at all? that seems like an awfully good package based on the company's performance while you wee in charge. I am a former AZ rep who was wrongly pushed out while the company went through it's severe downslide on your watch. I did my job, worked hard, and yet it wasn't enough. Hey, we had to cut corners and I guess I was the one that needed to be cut. now I am barely making it, living paycheck to almost paycheck. i have become quite good at shuffling the bills around, knowing how long an I really wait until the phone calls start and the phone line or cable goes out. But it's killing me. Stress is causing me to gain weight, my hair turning gray by the day, looking at my kids and wondering how can I sustain all this for them?

So how about a hand, brother? Can I ask you for a handout? Please take a look at your $65,000,000. I don't want 1% or .5%. I would like .25% of 65,000,000. A quarter of 1% of your "parting gift". That would pay off my mortgage and my family would be secure. Would you even notice that blip in your account? That blip you wouldn't notice would save my life.

THINK ABOUT IT DAVE
 




Hey dave, are you feeling guilty at all? that seems like an awfully good package based on the company's performance while you wee in charge. I am a former AZ rep who was wrongly pushed out while the company went through it's severe downslide on your watch. I did my job, worked hard, and yet it wasn't enough. Hey, we had to cut corners and I guess I was the one that needed to be cut. now I am barely making it, living paycheck to almost paycheck. i have become quite good at shuffling the bills around, knowing how long an I really wait until the phone calls start and the phone line or cable goes out. But it's killing me. Stress is causing me to gain weight, my hair turning gray by the day, looking at my kids and wondering how can I sustain all this for them?

So how about a hand, brother? Can I ask you for a handout? Please take a look at your $65,000,000. I don't want 1% or .5%. I would like .25% of 65,000,000. A quarter of 1% of your "parting gift". That would pay off my mortgage and my family would be secure. Would you even notice that blip in your account? That blip you wouldn't notice would save my life.

THINK ABOUT IT DAVE

David here,
thanks for all your hard work and blind dedication to this "company". You and others like you, have help make me into a very rich man indeed! Oh I know, the company went downhill after
I took over, but I did the best I could given the circumstances. Sort of like you, instead I end of with millions, and you can barely scrape by. My buddies on the Board of Directors took real good care of me. It's great having friends that think so much of you! Chin up! You will be fine!
Thanks
 




David here,
thanks for all your hard work and blind dedication to this "company". You and others like you, have help make me into a very rich man indeed! Oh I know, the company went downhill after
I took over, but I did the best I could given the circumstances. Sort of like you, instead I end of with millions, and you can barely scrape by. My buddies on the Board of Directors took real good care of me. It's great having friends that think so much of you! Chin up! You will be fine!
Thanks

Hi David-

I appreciate everything you did at AZ, it takes a person with special skills to do what you did. Some PSS's never understood the magnitude or complexity of your job. I for one think you deserve every dime you receive, you earned it! (and some). I believe in your strategy but it was a failure in execution which is responsible for AZ's current problem. In time your strategy will prove correct an your reputation will be vindicated. Good luck
 




David here,
thanks for all your hard work and blind dedication to this "company". You and others like you, have help make me into a very rich man indeed! Oh I know, the company went downhill after
I took over, but I did the best I could given the circumstances. Sort of like you, instead I end of with millions, and you can barely scrape by. My buddies on the Board of Directors took real good care of me. It's great having friends that think so much of you! Chin up! You will be fine!
Thanks

Well here's what you've got to worry about now, Dave-O:

Obama has printed about 5T of the paper you took to walk away and say "cheerio" to a lot of people.

The money is not going to be good for wiping your ass in another couple of months. You might be able to burn it in your woodstove to stay warm next winter. If you have a woodstove.