iPad 2?

[Anonymous]

Are they really giving new hire's iPad's?

 

[Anonymous]

Yes, Flower editions

 

[Anonymous]

Are they really giving new hire's iPad's?

Absolutely! John only needed to reallocation 250 people to pay for these vital productivity tools. It's innovative ideas like this that have given us the best pipeline in the industry.

 

[Anonymous]

Absolutely! John only needed to reallocation 250 people to pay for these vital productivity tools. It's innovative ideas like this that have given us the best pipeline in the industry.

Sorry, it is fifth-ranking innovative idea. There are four other pharmas that are using/planning to use iPad/ HP-pad for business recruits.

 

[Anonymous]

Sorry, it is fifth-ranking innovative idea. There are four other pharmas that are using/planning to use iPad/ HP-pad for business recruits.

Lilly is ALWAYS late to the party. Get used to it. Have a great career. Somewhere else.

 

[Anonymous]

They come pre-loaded with the LilLie Termination App; just spool off the documents to HR for Immolation, and hand it to the security guard who marches you out your last day. 53 new terminations for the week of March 28...

 

[Anonymous]

They come pre-loaded with the LilLie Termination App; just spool off the documents to HR for Immolation, and hand it to the security guard who marches you out your last day. 53 new terminations for the week of March 28...

If that is what is good for the patient, so be it. The patient is waiting. (Impatient patients?) Innovation is the name of the game.

 

[Anonymous]

Are they really giving new hire's iPad's?

They sent one to me. Said is was the new standard. Perfect for impressing doctors and the office staff.

 

[Anonymous]

They sent one to me. Said is was the new standard. Perfect for impressing doctors and the office staff.

Its just one of the many ideas that your leadership team has brought back from their trip to China. While you were all slacking in Indy, your leaders have brought back the answers - the answers that matter(tm).

You think IPads are good - they are just the start!!

Trading Cards with each script

Sponsor one of those orphan kids like Madonna, change their name to Humalog

Mascots (esp. ones that sell snack foods - polar bears and squirrels) (Neuro wants to call theirs “Bipolar Bear”)

Insulin Pen that actually writes so everyone can use it

Have sales reps wear red blazers and change title to “brand ambassador” - if that works well all P – class and S – class associates will be issued similar clothing

Flavors in our meds (cherry and purple-flavor are favorites)

Replace Sodrel buses with lower cost dirigibles

Eliminate all teambuilding events and replace with a corporate center “Casino Night” (tied with “slot machines in the meeting rooms” and “pay toilets”)

Replace employee bonus with autographed items from Lilly corporate shop

Sponsor a TV show about Col Lilly, initial scope is “Dukes of Hazzard meets Keeping Up with the Kardashians.” Hire Jack Nicholson to play Col. Lilly so he can explain what “rubbing another man’s rhubarb means”

 

[Anonymous]

Brilliant writing sir.!

More please, of the same quality.

 

[Anonymous]

Thank you for your input. A six sigma team will be assigned these tasks bright and early Monday Morning. They will be asked to evaluate similar items from the Vision Quest.

Thanks again, and please note that we have extended your severance pay to 5 weeks in appreciation per Lilly Care Policy 2010.01.03.0005.b.07 rev. 26f, paragraph 3.

Its just one of the many ideas that your leadership team has brought back from their trip to China. While you were all slacking in Indy, your leaders have brought back the answers - the answers that matter(tm).

You think IPads are good - they are just the start!!

Trading Cards with each script

Sponsor one of those orphan kids like Madonna, change their name to Humalog

Mascots (esp. ones that sell snack foods - polar bears and squirrels) (Neuro wants to call theirs “Bipolar Bear”)

Insulin Pen that actually writes so everyone can use it

Have sales reps wear red blazers and change title to “brand ambassador” - if that works well all P – class and S – class associates will be issued similar clothing

Flavors in our meds (cherry and purple-flavor are favorites)

Replace Sodrel buses with lower cost dirigibles

Eliminate all teambuilding events and replace with a corporate center “Casino Night” (tied with “slot machines in the meeting rooms” and “pay toilets”)

Replace employee bonus with autographed items from Lilly corporate shop

Sponsor a TV show about Col Lilly, initial scope is “Dukes of Hazzard meets Keeping Up with the Kardashians.” Hire Jack Nicholson to play Col. Lilly so he can explain what “rubbing another man’s rhubarb means”