Breaking News! BI to lay off 8,400 workers

Anonymous

Guest
Faced with poor sales figures from pradaxa due to safety concerns, and tradjenta in Q4 2011, BI has no choice but to slash its workforce by 8,400 people. More info soon.
 




















Wait a minute, it's a better argument to saw bi made the lives of over 500,000 people better because the now have less chance of having a stroke. Much snappier ring to it, no?
 
























Sorry, I was eating peanut butter at the time I read the memo in the home office and I accidentally smudged it where the numbers were so I cant remember the exact amount. But I swear on high, that there is a layoff due to our investors wanting to sell off the stock due to poor performance of Spiriva and Pradaxa not making any money.
 








Sorry, I was eating peanut butter at the time I read the memo in the home office and I accidentally smudged it where the numbers were so I cant remember the exact amount. But I swear on high, that there is a layoff due to our investors wanting to sell off the stock due to poor performance of Spiriva and Pradaxa not making any money.

What investors?
 




















Managed Care will never get laid off. They can not track us. I ref over 300 B-Ball games a month, get reimbursed for my mileage even though BI pays for my gas, and my wife uses company car all week while I am in hotels in cities dropping off literature to pharmacies. I used my team mate since he did all the work to get this gig and my manager is too dumb to know what is going on. Go BI!